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This site is intended to reveal a whole lot more about the Turtleman than is possible or appropriate in a cyber ad.  Though some of this may seem lighthearted or superficial, everything on these pages is one hundred percent true.  (I'm trying to become the next poster child for truth in advertising!)  Since I'm over 60, have no boss, no wife, and am not running for public office, why not tell it like it is?  If any of this scares you off, or perhaps peaks your curiosity to learn more, then it will have accomplished its purpose.  So, fasten your seat belt and keep that barf bag handy!

 Please "bare" with me - this page is continually under construction.  

Like the Turtleman, it's a work in progress!




Sorry - nothing really kinky here.  (By the way, do you know the difference between "kinky" and "perverted?"  Well, kinky is when you use a feather, and perverted is when you use the whole chicken!) 

Anyway, the Turtleman handle was bestowed upon me many years ago by a former girlfriend and dive buddy.  Basically, I've always been a "turtle person."  While growing up, one of my two brothers had asthma and was allergic to almost everything.  As a result, we couldn't have the usual dog or cat for a pet and had to settle for those little dime store turtles instead.  It didn't take long before I discovered that I really preferred those compact little creatures over other animals, and most people, anyway!  Some things just never change.  I have turtle paraphernalia all over the place and even named my company Terrapin, Inc. - the slow and stupid company!


Oh, my real name is Ron, but I also answer to Turtleman or just plain T-man.

Composed using Microsoft FrontPage  -  Sound in MIDI format

Originally created March 11, 1999
Last modified September 26, 2008

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